Henry's Dispatch
by entwined-in-a-web
Summary: What happens when Henry gets bored while working at Wal-Mart? Random crack fic/song fic. PLEASE REVIEW! Bad summary, sorry...


-1**A/N: HAHAHAHAHA! RANDOM CRACK FIC! Slash song fic sort of….**

**So…I was listening to In the Heights the other day and the song that I found I really liked was "Benny's Dispatch." And I thought to myself….I can TOTALLY see Henry doing that…So…What's better than Henry, Wal-Mart, and In the Heights all at once?**

**Well, I can't answer that at the moment…lol…**

**REVIEW PLEASE!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own N2N nor do I own Wal-Mart nor do I own In the Heights…I leave those rights to Tom Kitt, Brian Yorkey, Lin Manuel-Miranda, and whoever invented Wal-Mart…**

Henry sat bored and alone….but mostly bored. And Wal-Mart was not a fun place to be bored in…or, at least, that's what Natalie told him. The two had gotten a job at the local discounted shopping center commonly known to mankind as Wal-Mart. And who was stuck running the cash register? Henry.

It was about closing time...which meant one in the morning. The customers were all gone and the only employees left were cleaning up to lock up. But Henry had other things on his mind.

He grabbed the phone, the ones that were at every register, the ones used to make stupid announcements. And rather loudly, he began to sing.

"_Check one, two, three. Check one, two, three. This is Henry on the dispatch, yo_." He smiled to himself. No one really cared, so he kept on going, this time putting those awful Spanish classes to use. "Atencion, yo. Attention. It's Henry and I'd like to mention I'm on the microphone this morning. Honk ya horn if you want it."

And oddly enough, the guy working the bike section got a hold of those corny little bike horns and honked them in Henry's direction. _Yessss…It's working!, _he thought to himself, smiling again.

This time, he took his skills to a whole new level. And listening to those cop radios with those apps he got off his iPod were finally coming into play.

"_Okay, we got traffic on the west side. Get off at 79th and take the left side of Riverside Drive and ya might slide. West End's your best friend if you catch the lights. And don't take the Deegan, Manny Ramirez is in town this weekend. Sorry, Dominicans, take route 87, you ain't getting back in again."_

All of the sudden, he heard angry footsteps trudging his way. _Fuck! It's my boss!_ He threw the phone down and tried to act innocent. But he quickly sighed, relieved, as he saw it wasn't his boss. It was Natalie (who, more or less, was his boss anyway).

"Henry…what the _hell_ are you doing?"

He couldn't help but to crack a smile as he picked the phone up yet again. "Aw, c'mon, Nat. It's fun!"

"You're acting like a five year old…"

"But it's _fun. _ Don't you know how to have fun?"

She threw him an annoyed glare and scoffed. "Well, my definition of fun doesn't exactly mean grabbing a mic and rapping over a PA system…"

"Stop being such a buzz kill…here. You just watch the technique."

He grabbed the phone once again and began to sing.

"_There's a traffic accident, I have to mention, at the intersection of 10th Ave. and the Jacob Javitz Convention Center. And check it, don't get stuck in the rubber-neckin' on 192nd. There's a double-decker bus wreck."_ He looked over at Natalie and smirked evilly. "_Now listen up, we've got a special guest!"_

"Henry…"

"_Live and direct from this aisle down west. Welcome her back, 'cause she looks mad stressed-!"_

And before he knew it, Natalie snatched the phone from his hands, glaring angrily.

"Ok, they've had enough…"

But the guy in the bike aisle continued to honk the horns as Henry ran to the next register to pick up the phone.

"_Honk your horns…She smiling! Say hello!"_

He gestured towards Natalie to sing into the phone as well. She gave him a look like he was some sort of idiot. She refused…until he began to pout and she had to give in just so he would stop acting like an ass.

Reluctantly, she held the phone up to her mouth and belted, "_HELLO…Good morning…" _After which she hung up immediately.

Henry was hanging up his phone as well as he fell to the floor, laughing his ass off.

"What?" She asked, rather defensive.

"That…That was…HILARIOUS!!!"

She rolled her eyes at him. "Stop…I hate singing in front of people…"

He immediately tried to shut up as she threw him a cold glare. "Sorry…sorry…but you do have a pretty voice though…"

She accidentally let a smile slip past her. "Ok, fine…I forgive you…Can we just lock up and go home?"

"Yeah…"

So they walked towards the door and were about to leave when suddenly Henry just stopped.

"What?" Natalie asked, somewhat concerned about the evil glare on his face.

"Wanna sing "Totally Fucked" tomorrow?"

She rolled her eyes and walked away.

"Ah, well…At least I tried…"

**A/N: Hahaha! You knows those iPod apps where it's like the police radios? That's where that reference came from…lol…**

**Reviews?**


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